uncomfortable…

Lord, we have become too comfortable,

Sitting across my living room last night, he prayed this.  Of all those gathered in my home, I’ve known him the longest.  I first met him 1983, years before I met the one I call my man.  I’ve known his wife almost as long.  Through the friendship of our sons we’ve become reacquainted.  

make us uncomfortable

He prayed this and my heart screamed NO!  NO MORE!!  A miscommunication with the facility that our church of 160 rents week after week and a bigger miscommunication with my man and I and I am welcoming sixty-six people into our home five minutes after I dash out ahead of them to do some sort of preparation.  How do you prepare for ten crock-pots and five salads?  Where do you put twelve desserts and eight casseroles?  Even more… where do you put 66 people?

so that we rely on You

…oh… yeah…. So that I rely on You.  Your power is made perfect in my weakness.  Your love shines through a dirty floor and a stack of towels on the bathroom counter.  Your grace offers nursing moms a closed door and an unmade bed for some privacy.  Your kindness says “Welcome!  Come in!”   Your goodness says, “Please, help yourselves.”

I am the weaker vessel.  I did not say any of that.  In hindsight I only wish I had.  I wish I were Jesus gracious.  I wish I were Jesus kind and Jesus good.  I spout such platitudes… “this house belongs to Him, I want to use it for Him” and “all that I have is Yours” until He uses them.  Then I stomp the feet of my heart and clench its fists and allow “that’s not what I meant” to seep in and start to poison my heart.  

I’m glad the other Chad prayed those words last night… words of insight, words of truth, words of grace.  The words that cooled my hot heart.  

When the last walked out the door and all that was left was a big bag of trash, I sat in the silence and listened.  I could still hear the laughter and the joy that these friends of ours brought.  

I’m sure I would have enjoyed that laughter and joy more, though, if I had listened when I was surrounded by those I love.


My list of grace gifts continues…

… for the right surgeon at the right time to put Eric’s elbow back together
… for a great week with my son
… for no more pain
… for a return to school
… for surprisingly little school work to make up

… for lessons learned in communicating with the school
… for two emails this weekend as school officials strive to work with us
… for a heart that has cooled off 
… for the times God closes my mouth just as He closed the mouths of the lions with Daniel
… for the relationship my man has with Eric’s surgeon

… for friends celebrating Sabbath with us
… for their wisdom in all things triathlon
… for laughter
… for great stories
… for life

… for a church that my children love
… for heart felt corporate prayer
… for honest prayer requests
… for friends
… for my man’s hospitality

… for a slow morning
… for healing for my mom
… for fun phone conversations
… for family that stays connected over the miles
… for life lessons I still learn at 42

… for these and so much more, I am grateful.  

Care to join the gratitude community at Ann’s and join in counting gifts to 1000 and more?

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