1995

1995…
the number of book downloads this weekend.

2000…
the number I asked for.

My heart cannot…
will not…
accept this as coincidence.

No.

This is God’s work in my life
to bring glory to Him.

I’ve struggled with numbers…
I think my entire life.

I am horrible at simple addition, subtraction,
multiplication and division…
yet, this is SO much more that that,
and the numbers I struggle with
are so much more than those.

I struggle with attaching meaning to a number…
especially numbers that define me
and my own perception of my worth.

Number exist all around me
as a means of measurement.

It is when a number becomes a means of measure
that I trip up,
and
fall flat.

The number on the scale,
the number on my birth certificate,
the number on the bank statement,
the number various sales reports…

these are simply numbers
they have no value,
unless I ascribe value to them.

Jesus, Himself, spoke
of ascribing value…

He must become greater and greater;
I must become less and less.
John 3:30 (NLT)

So, 1995 is a reminder to me,
that He is in control,
I am not.

In His math,
the only numbers that matter
are the ones that bring ALL glory
to HIm.

He is God,
I am not…

and neither are the numbers I seek.

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