Nobody told us this part, did they?
Did they tell you that there would be moments when the earth will seem to spin out of control and your world will seemingly stop… all in the same nanosecond? Did you know that moments were coming when you would not know where your child was and that fancy smart phone that they carry would go straight to voice mail…over and over and over again? Did anyone mention that there will be seasons and times and more than one time when you will look at your child and wonder where they went and who it is that now inhabits a body and face that looks familiar?
Nobody told me these things either.
Or…maybe they did and I didn’t hear them,
because maybe I wouldn’t have listened to them any way.
I thought I knew. I thought I knew all the parts of parenting and how I would
respond in any given situation. I thought I had done it all right to avoid the messy and ugly and down-right heart racing times. I thought there were simple formulas and easy answers.
And then there is the moment of the one word text…Mom.
In the moment after it all spun around…and before reality set in, it was that one word text that set my heart racing.
I wonder if I ever heard that a mom’s heart can race for hours…even after everything is okay. Did anyone tell me that I would wonder if my heartbeat will return to its normal rhythm, and then I would wonder what normal is? Did I know this? Do you?
Maybe I know a little bit more than I realized. I know that there are no easy steps or simple formulas because though this mama’s heart races out of rhythm with worry and dread, doubts and guilt, fear and anxiety, I know I am not in control. He is.
So, Mama when your pulse quickens and you can’t catch your breath…when your blood pressure pounds in the unknown and you can’t drown out the sound…when your heart races and your feet drag…there is One who loves your loved ones more than you do and even in the midst, He’s got them and He loves them infinitely more than you can imagine.