when real life squeezes…

Hello. I missed you.

Regardless of how long it’s been since you’ve seen someone, sometimes it’s the first words spoken after a long pause of silence that are the hardest to squeeze out.

Squeezed.

That is how I feel these days.

Squeezed between work and home. After 20+ years of being home or working part-time, I took a full-time job in September. This job literally fell in my lap and in many ways it has been a great blessing. However, it is in the learning to adjust that I’m squeezed tight.

The things I love to do, the people I love to talk with, the words I love to write. . . these things and more have been squeezed out to make room and time for new responsibilites and relationships.

It’s neither good nor bad, it’s just new and different.

Last night, I spent just a few minutes in the building where my family spends much of the month of December. It’s where we price and sort toys for a ginormous toy consignment sale and then those profits are used for an even greater event of giving away new toys and Jesus to area children in need at Christmas time. This place is where our hearts are each Christmas season. This year, my heart is there and my body is sitting in a chair across town.

Squeezed.

One of the hidden blessings of Toy Time is the fact that I get to catch up with friends I don’t often get to see. Last night, I got just a few minutes to connect with my amazing, writer friend, Amy. She is the one who blessed me with her knowledge of writing and encouraged me to pursue authorship. She’s amazing!

We talked of work and our day jobs for a few minutes and she asked, “are you writing?”

“No, I don’t have time. I took a break over the summer to spend time with the kids and then this job came.” Amy smiled knowingly and I continued, “I need to though. I need the creative outlet. Maybe after the holidays.”

With wisdom and grace she simply replied, “you can take a break from writing but will writing take a break from you?”

Truth spoken right to my soul.

I think I’ve had it all upside down and backwards again. I need to create in various ways. I like to craft, to knit, to crochet. And, I love to write. Yet, I let those things be squeezed out.

Perhaps instead of being squeezed out, I should have been squeezing back. Squeezing out snippets and words each night to keep the creative light ablaze.

Maybe a life well lived is a life that squeezes every ounce out of every moment instead of just being squeezed.

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