erasing history like it’s 1984

Posted on August 18, 2017August 18, 2017 by Heidi Kreider

The year was 1984 and I sat, enraptured, watching the novel of the same name play across my high school’s stage. Attending the performance was a requirement for my sophomore English class. Watching 1984 that evening was my first introduction to George Orwell. A week later, I finished the novel. I couldn’t get it out of my mind. While it made sense from a literary fiction standpoint, I couldn’t get it to make sense in my mind as any sort of reality.

2 plus 2 does not equal 5, regardless of how many times you tell me it does.

Big brother isn’t watching, I mean, really? How could he?

And, doublethink? It isn’t possible.

“Every record has been destroyed or falsified, every book rewritten, every picture has been repainted, every statue and street building has been renamed, every date has been altered. And the process is continuing day by day and minute by minute. History has stopped. Nothing exists except an endless present in which the Party is always right.” ~George Orwell, 1984

That was a fall evening in 1984.

Welcome to 2017 where the thought police roam social media, individuals find freedom in hating others, and only feelings matter.

We’ve deleted scenes from our history books, we’ve denied our past, and we’ve destroyed the evidence. And now? Now, we are accepting our own version of an alternate reality. A surrogate reality in which history makes us feel good and reveals that our own set of beliefs is right and everyone is wrong.

We’re doing this by erasing history like it’s 1984.

To what end? To a society in which the Party is always right? Who’s the party and why do we think they’re always right?

In the words of a long-time friend… who’s ‘they’ anyway?

We’ve become a society of US vs THEM. Regardless of where you land, and how many sides to the battle you see, everyone is fighting to prove another side wrong, driven by fear and hatred.

Have we noticed that the battle is getting bloodier and no one is winning?

Erasing history doesn’t erase the pain of generations past nor does it change the torment of our present battles.

“The object of terrorism is terrorism. The object of oppression is oppression. The object of torture is torture. The object of murder is murder. The object of power is power. Now do you begin to understand me?” ~ George Orwell, 1984

The history that is so quickly being deleted, denied, and destroyed by those on multiple sides is the very story that defines who we are and where we’ve been. Erasing it only denies the generations to come the freedom to learn from our past and to live better than we who are battling US vs THEM with fear and hatred are.

Seems like a great gift to leave our grandchildren and great-grandchildren.

And, let’s leave the erasing of history to 1984.

when life shifts…

Posted on August 17, 2017August 17, 2017 by Heidi Kreider

Once upon a time, I used to blog here.

“Used to” is the operative phrase in that sentence. It’s been over 11 months since I last chronicled any part of my life in this small corner. I hung out here often, sharing snippets of my journey and stories of my kids. So much has happened in those 11 months. Mostly, a monumental shift.

A significant shift in life and I’m now in a new season. My kids grew up. Two are adults now, one is on her way. My nest isn’t exactly empty but it is definitely quieter.

In this season, I’m struggling to find my voice and to put into words my journey because, for so long, my voice and my journey centered around my offspring, my 3 Es. My life was so wrapped in and around theirs that the snippets that I freely shared were as much my stories as theirs. It was all part of being a mom in the crazy and the chaos of a homeschooling family of five.

The shift happened long before I recognized it for what it was but I know for a fact that on a cool May morning, three days after her high school graduation party, we huddled together to pray with our girl before she drove herself four hours south for the summer, I knew I was standing on the other side of the shift.

Four evenings later, when I sat on a bench seat in the front row to watch my son pledge his life to the one who holds his heart, there was no question that I was on the other side of this shift in parenting.

Honestly, this season is amazing. It is rich and full and fun. I spent this morning with my newest daughter and my youngest daughter driving through torrential downpours and bargain shopping for groceries with laughter and rich conversation. And, this evening, enjoying a busy kitchen as my girls made homemade tortillas for tacos.

In this season, though, I have struggled with finding words because the stories I live are no longer my own to tell. I have a front row seat to watch the stories God is writing with each of my kids.

I am now mom to 3 Es and an L and that sweet L is the one who encouraged me to come back to this little corner of the web. She’s a writer and a blogger herself and she understands my need for words and for stories. She gently reminded me that I do have things to share. I have my version which is how all of this plays out from my vantage point… from the view of a mom and mom-in-law.

So, in this new shift of life and in this new season, here I am. In just over 24 hours, we will help settle the next one into college life and a dormitory and this fall I will travel all over to chase my favorite volleyball player. There will be late night phone calls and deep laughter around my table. There will also be quiet days and lonely moments and all of it is my story, just shifted.

working-from-home isn’t all rainbows… 3 things to consider

Posted on August 18, 2016August 20, 2016 by Heidi Kreider

For some of us, working from home sounds wonderful. What could be better than setting your own hours, working in a tee shirt and jeans, and avoiding morning rush hour?

I’m a big work-from-home fan. I love the opportunities it has afforded me and my family. I love that I can wear my jeans to work and I love slow mornings. Sounds great, huh? I think so. However, it’s not all rainbows and butterflies.

If you are thinking of working from home, here are three things to consider:

Working from home is still work. In a perfect world, we could all do what we want to do with our time and still have the income we desire in our bank accounts. Unfortunately, for most of us, this utopia doesn’t exist. While working from home look can look as different as the women doing it, it still starts with the word-work.
Working from home still requires time sacrifice. Just as you trade your time for money when you go to the office (or the retail store or the factory) you are trading your time at home for money. One of the joys of working from home is that often you can choose which hours of your day you will trade for income. Even still, it’s still a trade.
Working from home often means trying again and again. You might submit a bid, apply for a position, meet potential clients only to find out that either you aren’t right for the job or the job isn’t right for you. It’s okay. You win some, you lose some, and you learn along the way. Thankfully, you get to try again tomorrow.

It’s not all rainbows. It’s not easy. It is work.

And, it can be good.

Is it for you?

working from home: 3 keys to the journey

Posted on July 28, 2016August 20, 2016 by Heidi Kreider

It seems like every single day I field questions like:

How do you work from home?

Is it legit?

Do you think I could do it too?

Some people are happy going to work every day. They enjoy working away from home in an office, store, or cubicle. Though I’m not one of them, I am thrilled that they have found their place in this life.

The rest of us are aching for a different journey. We want a path that gives us the freedom to set our own hours, to be our own boss, and to work from anywhere that isn’t an office, store, or cubicle. We just don’t know how to get there.

Recently, I’ve talked to several friends who are successfully working from home. I’ve asked them about their journey, how they came to do what they currently do, and how they got started.

Amazingly, although they have different businesses and careers, they all gave me almost the same answers.

3 keys to the journey:

1) It takes FAITH. A successful journey takes faith in a God bigger than you can ever imagine and faith in the gifts and abilities that He has gifted you.

Faith shows the reality of what we hope for; it is the evidence of things we cannot see. Hebrews 11:1 (nlt)

Faith becomes the compass that directs every path journeyed.

2) It takes a VISION. Before you begin any journey, you need a vision. Make goals and write them down. Keep them in front of you. Goals keep you focused.

Where there is no vision, the people perish. Proverbs 29:18 (kjv)

Vision becomes True North on your compass.

3) It takes COURAGE. Every journey presents opportunities to give up and quit your dream. It takes courage to stay the course when the days are long and hard.

Be strong and courageous! Joshua 1:6 (nlt)

Courage keeps the compass in front of you.

A successful journey isn’t an easy one but successful people don’t choose the easy path, they choose the path that’s worth it.

And, they journey with faith, vision, and courage.

the joy of working from home

Posted on July 25, 2016August 20, 2016 by Heidi Kreider

This is my view this week.

My youngest and I ran away to the lake again. The joy in running away is we don’t have a plan or a schedule. We don’t have a set time to arrive and we don’t always know how long we will be here. My mom graciously lets us hang out until we get water logged and sunburned and ready to go home. There’s food in the fridge and a washer when we run out of clean clothes. It’s a really good gig!

As they were walking out the door to go to town to look for craft supplies for Ellen, my Mom said, “I’m sorry you have to work or you could go with us!”

To which I replied, “I’m so glad to be working from here!”

This is the joy of working from home.

I can work from anywhere.

Ok… maybe not anywhere because who wants to work while kayaking?

The joy of working from home means I simply need my phone, my computer, and a wifi connection. I can work while my girl spends time with her grandma, fishes, kayaks, paddleboards, and binge watches Fixer Upper.

After spending my time away from home to earn an income, I realized I can’t get that time behind a desk back.

Life is short. We all get a certain number of days and I’m learning to put a high price on my time. I’m learning to run away, to chase sunsets, and to spend time face to face with my friends and family.

In doing so, I’ve discovered the hidden joy of working from anywhere… I get to be with those I love the most.

when the words slide off the page

Posted on July 22, 2016July 23, 2016 by Heidi Kreider

I had it all arranged, the paragraphs, the indents, the white space. The structure was sound, the arrangement was balanced. It looked good. I could tell you the outline and I could describe the characters. I didn’t know subplots, just yet, but I could tell you knew where the story was headed, where it would go, and how it would end. I had it all figured out.

Suddenly, though, all the words just slid off the page into a mountain of typeset letters piled high. I had a white computer screen and a jumbled mess. I was dumbfounded.

This was part of a dream I had this week. I have spent much time, this summer, contemplating life, mostly where I am and where I want to be. Apparently, my sub-conscience was in overdrive the other night because I would guess this dream was more reality than fantasy.

Here’s the thing. When I first woke up, I wigged out. Wild, random thoughts filled my mind.

“Does this mean I’m done writing?”

“If written all my life, in one form or another. What will I do?”

“Have I lost my purpose?”

A few cups of coffee, a little time, and a whole lot of Jesus helped settle me down and put things back in their right perspective.

I haven’t written much this summer. It’s been quiet here on the blog, quiet in my journals, quiet in my next book. As quiet as it’s been here and there, it’s not been quiet in my real life. Instead of writing, I’ve been talking to and connecting with women daily.

One of the greatest blessings of coming home to work is the connections I have made with so many women who are either doing the same thing or are seeking to be able to do it. I’ve been able to share my story and encourage others to pursue their God-given gifts and abilities to find ways to work from home (feel free to join our Facebook group for inspiration and encouragement).

I am finding deep purpose in meeting women where they are and connecting them with where they want to be. It’s not rocket science and I’m obviously not the first person to do this. However, God keeps bringing women to me and I keep answer the question, “How can I do what you are doing?”

I’ve lived long enough to know that life is full of seasons. This is my season to share with women.

So, back to the dream. I figured out what it meant. Last week, I was sent a writing proposal. This morning, I sent a heartfelt apology and turned it down. Thankfully my publishing friend responded with grace and understanding and I learned a little bit more about myself.

Mostly this, when the words slide off the page, it’s time to turn to the next adventure.

in the quiet…

Posted on June 16, 2016 by Heidi Kreider

It’s been quiet around here. Again.

So many thoughts and snippets of posts float in and out of my mind. I open Facebook, either for my work or for myself, and any thoughts I have had get drowned out by the noise. In the loud, none of my thoughts or snippets stick.

It’s loud and it’s getting louder.

I feel as though the music in this great orchestra called Life just hit another crescendo. A moment when all the instruments turned up their volume just a bit to be heard. Only, in this moment, instead of all instruments being in precise tune and rhythm with one another playing along in symphonic harmony, this tune has everyone is playing their own music, rhythm, and speed. With every newsworthy event, the noise simply gets louder.

It sounds awful.

The noise is this culture in which we live. It is a culture that judges harshly and calls each other out loud, all over invisible platforms called social media. Everyone has an opinion and no one is afraid to use theirs… strongly. The name calling becomes resounding as those who judged are then judged for judging. The sound of fingers tapping on keyboards is drowned out by the verbal attack posts using CAPITAL LETTERS.

In the noise, none of my thoughts stick.

I’ve closed my computer more than a few times, lately, and walked away from the crescendo. In doing so, I’ve come to remember something I quickly forget. When I close my computer and turn off the TV, it’s remarkably quiet, mostly peaceful, and I can hear my thoughts again. Sometimes, the noise in my world becomes overwhelming because of things that happen that are out of my control. Other times, it’s because I’ve let the noise of others drown out the sounds of my real life.

The joy comes in turning off the noise that is drowning out this one life I live.

This week, I’ve heard the heartbeat of my family around a game table and the sound of my son’s voice when he calls just to check on our weekend plans. I’ve heard the giggles of girl cousins and the conversation of sisters. In the quiet today, I hear the music of wind rustling green leaves and the rhythm of the mower cutting blades of grass. I hear the sweet sound of children laughing and the tunes of my girl singing over the whirl of the mower engine.

In the quiet, I hear the words I almost missed.

In the quiet, the symphony is beautiful.

Honeycomb (1)

“The object of terrorism is terrorism. The object of oppression is oppression. The object of torture is torture. The object of murder is murder. The object of power is power. Now do you begin to understand me?” ~ George Orwell, 1984

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